#27: You get knocked down, but you get up again
The 4 Steps To Getting Over An Interview Rejection
Image: Visionhaus/GettyImages
If you’ve followed this blog or received this email for a while, you’ll know I’ve NEVER written about football.
Why?
Because I know next to nothing about it. I don’t follow it (or any sport), I don’t really know who anyone is, and only can be bothered to watch it when England play. Where’s John Barnes and Michael Owen, anyway?
I’ve been to a few matches, sure, but it’s been more for the event than knowing where the match leaves anyone in the standings.
So why write about it now?
Well, there’s a lesson to be learned, that’s why.
>> Hone your CV and interview technique now!
When Harry Kane stepped up to take his 21st spot kick (look at me using the lingo, my mate Dave’ll cringe) for England on Friday night, he was laser focused.
His 20th, earlier in the game, had gone in, top left of the net.
Yes, no doubt he was nervous, but he also knew he could do it. He got the last one past France’s keeper, so why not?
But then it happened. He took it, and it sailed over the crossbar.
And instead of the country being behind him, they gleefully took the piss with meme after meme comparing him to a rugbyist.
How do you come back from that?
I mean, just how do you dust yourself off from a fail on the world’s biggest stage, in front of millions of people?
Coaching, resilience, and belief.
How do you think he’s going to feel when he steps up to take his 22nd? Or the next one for Tottenham?
4 Steps To Coming Back From Rejection
Getting knocked down and getting up again since 1997
Here’s some ideas that can be used to channel your inner Chumbawumba and get up again from an interview rejection.
1 - Breathe.
Recognise that it didn’t go well, and that many factors were at play - some you were in control of, others not. Being philosophical about the knock back will help you use the experience positively and enable you to move on more quickly.
Getting shirty about it, blaming the environment, the interviewer, the questions, the tests—will not help.
You can only control what is, not what could have been, so there’s no point in ruminating over and over. The time has passed. It wasn’t personal.
2 - Get feedback
Getting the interviewer’s feedback can be tricky, but you absolutely must ask. You’re unlikely to get anything useful to work on otherwise. If you get the old “the other candidate was a better fit” be confident to ask one more time for a titbit of something you can work with.
“I understand they were a better fit, but what was it you were looking for that I didn’t demonstrate this time? It would be extremely helpful for my next interview”
You will definitely get nothing if you do not ask.
>> Hone your CV and interview technique now!
3. Assess
Look at the interview objectively. Write a list. What went well in your eyes, and what went less well? What questions came up that made you falter, what made you waffle on? What do you need to communicate more clearly next time? Which bits did you nail?
How did you feel? Too nervous and you might have froze. Too laid back, and they might think you think you’ve ‘arrived’, or that you weren’t that interested. Take the feedback if you gleaned some.
Think about your preparation. How much did you do? Did you wing it or did you have a raft of examples ready to go? What about those questions you hoped wouldn’t come up—so you did no prep for them? We’ve all done it, and then got rejected.
Get a third party to listen to your answers, preferably an interview coach. They’ll tell you what’s what. How you can hone your answers, how you can open up and improve your story telling, or, quite honestly, if you you sound like a jerk.
But jerks and knobheads don’t normally have the self awareness to recognise this in the first place.
Anyway, jot it all down.
4 - Action plan.
Unsurprisingly, focus on the things that didn’t go so well.
Consider how you can prepare better for interviews. Does that mean thinking more about the kinds of questions you’re likely to get asked, and prepping answers?
Did you waffle? Or not say enough? What can you do to improve that?
Is there something you can do to help you feel more fresh and alert, and on your game? An early night, a podcast to get you off to sleep and not lie thinking about the next day is a good idea.
Like Kane’s pre-pen sock adjustment, is there a routine that can help you gain clarity and calm before the event?
Could it be that the company or role were never going to be a great fit? If you look objectively, were you going for practice? If so this is flawed. Being too cocky, or or not confident enough will shine through like an halogen headlamp. If the job isn’t for you, and you know it, don’t go.
Using the “I didn’t really want the job anyway” line afterwards is your internal bullshit and you know it.
Arming yourself with a new bunch of answers or examples and practicing them (with a friend, in front of the mirror, or with an interview coach) will help you redevelop your confidence.
You know that the likelihood of the same question coming up elsewhere is remote, but this is an important piece of the confidence rebuilding jigsaw.
Having more tools in your kitbag is essential.
Common questions you can prepare yourself for, at any level, include…
“Talk me through your CV”
“Why have you applied for this role?”
“What are your weaknesses?”
“What’s the biggest strength you can bring to this role?”
And that’s before you get on to behavioural interview questions. Find a framework that works for you, or ask me for one and I’ll send one over.
It’s also important to consider what did go well, and what elements of your approach you could use for other answers. Acknowledge the small wins.
Anyway, I’ve just written this and realised I’ve made absolutely zero concessions to the fact that it’s Christmas in a couple of weeks. I’m going to be away for the first time ever, drenching myself in Spanish sun, drinking local branded spirits from the bar, and chilling out with the family.
But I’ll be back in the new year to help you get your 2023 job hunt rocking and rolling, support you with your career growth plans, and generally have a bloody marvellous next 12 months.
Thank you for reading, and merry Christmas.
Phil
>> Hone your CV and interview technique now!
In the socials…
Been quite busy this last couple of weeks trying out some new formats and ideas. I’m sure you’ll take something from this flurry of goodness.
Here’s one where I stuck my neck out with an idea that bore fruit the next day. If you don’t ask, you don’t get.
Here’s one that’ll help you get shortlisted in 3 steps.
And here’s a video I did that’ll help you think differently about your job hunt. Go on.
Need some guidance on a particular topic? Just email me at Phil@philsterne.com and I’ll write about it.
