#2: Come with me if you want to live!

How I found my new me and regained my mojo

No, I’m not Kyle Reese dropping out of the sky, naked, having been sent back in time by my mate John Connor to protect his unwitting mum from Arnie… and then inadvertently conceive him.

But, I am calling from the future to make sure you’re taking the right actions and making the right decisions NOW to give you the best chances of living your best life.

It’s 1am Friday night when I’m writing this. My second … well … newsletter? I hate that term. 

Sat on the sofa, lights dimmed, dog curled round my thigh, listening to West End Girls quietly on my headphones because I don’t want my stereo blasting all over the house. Gotta love the 80s tunes.

I’m wired. It’s been one of those weeks. No, not one of those, the other, good type.

The type where it’s felt great. Daft busy, but great. 

It’s been crazy couple of weeks since the start of the new year, with lots of people in for a bit of “New Year, New Me” action, so I’ve been wall to wall and head to toe in quotations, proposals and delivery.

Fortunately I’ve not had many of those bad weeks for a long time. In fact I can’t remember having one for approaching 2 years since I left the whirlwind that was Amazon.

Back then, I was having some mental health issues, not for the first time in my then 44 years, brought on by work-related stress. It was pretty horrible.

But with support, counselling, some self prescribed art/creative therapy and sleep (lots of it, I lost countless days if not weeks through utter lethargy) I came through it and somehow managed to set up what became a successful business.

I kind of always expected things to work out OK. I swing wildly between hedonistic optimism and total pessimism, but I am fortunate that I received a lot of encouragement and (largely) positive reinforcement growing up. Don’t get me wrong, like most I have massive imposter syndrome in many areas of my life, and have never considered myself particularly great at anything - adequate at best.

So what on earth was I doing going out on my own and setting up a business?

Some of my friends thought I was nuts (or brave) quitting jobs with nothing to go to when they’ve made me unhappy - particularly with a mortgage, and then a family.

Some find it incredible that I’ve managed to carve some semblance of an income (at all) out of doing what I’m doing now - and taken all the risks to do so.

One, when we were at Alton Towers with his brother and cousin in the summer, said “hey Phil, tell ‘em what you’re doing for a living”. I said “I write peoples’ CVs”.

“Yeah that’s right! People actually PAY him several hundreds of pounds to write their fucking CVs! And that’s his JOB!” - Dave.

Yeah, I know, crazy huh?

Reflecting on it all, it’s been a bit of a journey. One that I’ve enjoyed and continue to enjoy, because I know I’m helping people avoid those weeks and find their New Me, and not just in the New Year.

Whether it’s the CV that needs a proper overhaul, some confidence boosting interview practice or just some help chewing through some career options, it’s truly rewarding.

So what am I saying?

I guess that bits of your life can be really shit, but they can become really amazing with the right inputs and support. For example, after I left Amazon I had loads of encouragement to get the CV writing going - ex-colleagues, my professional network, family, my therapist…. and once a few clients wrote some testimonials…. well I was off. “What’s the worst that can happen?” I asked myself.

Since, those same people plus more have come out in support. Business guidance, writing support, amazing support that keeps my imposter syndrome at bay.

So, keep plugging away. Some questions for you to ponder:

1. What’s the one thing you’ve always wanted to do but found an excuse not to?

2. What single action would get you over that mental barrier?

3. Who in your network could provide you with the encouragement you need?

I’ll be back….

Phil

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Here’s some of my recent thoughts and quick wins from Linkedin. Take a look - there may be something there you can put in to action straight away:

Here’s something with some ideas for dealing with stress and depression. It truly help me get back to being me.

Here’s something about making space and time to think. I did it once, and it was revelationary. Is that a word?

Here’s something about the difference between “fewer” and “less”. Important if you want to make less social faux pas.

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